A New Look at Life

Um, did anyone else notice the widget on the side of my blog?  Am I REALLY having a baby in six weeks?!  For my physical comfort, it would be nice if she came early.  But because I am no where near ready for this, late would be okay too.  I can't believe how fast this pregnancy has gone. 
So the kids and I came out to Denver for the next three weeks.  We are currently at the hotel where Jon has been staying the past month.  We find out tonight if an apartment will rent to us for only three weeks.  If not, we're going to stay here.  I feel kind of white trash living in a hotel.  And I say living because it's not like we have a home to go to somewhere else.  We're pretty much transients.  Oh well, such is the life.
The last couple days before leaving Utah I was stressed to the max.  I was ornery, grumpy, and moody.  But just talking with Jon on the drive out to Denver made me feel better.  I can't believe how much I have missed being together as a family.  I realized I missed Jon, but it was like peace came back into my mind and I felt like I could cope with everything again just because I was with him.  I am so blessed to have him and even more blessed to get to live in the same state with him again.  I feel like Jon makes me a more positive person.  And I worry less.  I was always such a planner and spontaneity was not my forte.  I think we are a good balance for each other.  Granted, we would both love a little more stability right now, but Jon makes it all feel like it's more of an adventure and less of something to be dreaded.  Having said that, I have started looking at all the positives lately.
~We are having a baby!  When is that NOT exciting?!  And if all these tests come back positive, we have a 25% percent chance of having another baby with SMA.  So, difficult decision of whether or not or when to get pregnant...avoided!
~We are together as a family.  Pros all around for obvious reasons.
~We are in a studio hotel that has a full size fridge and a stovetop, way better than a mini fridge and just a microwave.  Though we do have a microwave.  And, we were also able to push the two double beds together so we have one ginormous beds.  The kids think it's great and it opened up the room to have more space to play.  A lot of hotels bolt their beds down so you can't do that.
~We have a job!  Wow, that feels amazing.
~Vanessa is completely healthy and showing no signs of SMA.  She is hilarious and keeps us on our toes, laughing and shaking our heads along the way.
~Benson is going to have a lot of physical difficulties but man that kid is smart.  He amazes me all the time and I know that he will shine in so many ways.  He is going to have so many talents, and so many amazing things.