I finally did it. I pulled Vanessa from public school. It was a liberating and terrifying moment. Terrifying because it was now all me. And so liberating to be done with the public schools and everything I was dreading about them. I have been contemplating homeschool since we moved to Missouri. For whatever reason, homeschool is much more popular in the midwest than it is out west. Maybe it has something to do with the schools here, I honestly don't know. Having never experienced another school system as a parent, I can't give a good opinion on that. It may have something to do with the "Bible belt" as well because a lot of families state religious reasons being the number one factor in deciding to homeschool.
I feel like there were exactly 1,298 reasons we
should homeschool and one very debilitating reason why we
shouldn't homeschool. And that
one reason was holding me back. Vanessa started public school in mid August. Taking her to school, I wanted to cry. Not the typical, "oh my baby is growing up" tears. But it was this knot in my gut saying, "is this the right thing for my daughter or for our family?"
I felt I couldn't get around this
one reason to make homeschool be everything I wanted it to be. Until I found stumbled across a couple of articles that actually made me feel better. There is
this one. Granted this is talking about preschool kids but I feel it still applies. This was my favorite quote:
"
Many people assume that kids need to spend lots of time with peers to develop strong preschool social skills. They don't."
There is also this one. My favorite quote from this was: “People for some reason define socialization for kids as interacting only with kids, but if socialization means only interacting with kids that are exactly the same age as you, then that seems pretty narrow.”
Then there is always good ole sarcastic Matt Walsh. My favorite point he made was this: "Homeschooling might be increasingly popular, but the vast majority of the people you meet have been public schooled. And you’re telling me that the vast majority of the people you meet are ‘socially well adjusted’?"
If we want to look more at studies, there were two studies done recently that were discussed in this article from the Washington Times. I found this very interesting: "When measured against the average Canadians ages 15 to 34 years old, home-educated Canadian adults ages 15 to 34 were more socially engaged (69 percent participated in organized activities at least once per week, compared with 48 percent of the comparable population). Average income
for home-schoolers also was higher, but perhaps more significantly, while 11 percent of Canadians ages 15 to 34 rely on welfare, there were no cases of government support as the primary source of income for home-schoolers. Home-schoolers also were happier; 67.3 percent described themselves as very happy, compared with 43.8 percent of the comparable population. Almost all of the home-schoolers — 96 percent — thought home-schooling had prepared them well for life."
My favorite article however, I can't find again. It talked about how socialization while children are too young may actually be harmful to their own development of identity. That they aren't actually learning to be their own person but are learning to be like their peers. The psychologist writing the article felt children should be mainly with parents until they are at least 6.
I had finally read something that was "the other side of the coin." I finally read the other side. It seems there is little of it when it comes to socializing outside public school because public school is the norm. And for whatever reason, many still consider homeschoolers to be "weird."
I also realized that my kids are already "weird." We are Mormons surrounded by Baptists, Catholics, Protestants; but not many other Mormons. We have {almost} four kids, which is not crazy here but not common. We don't "play" on Sundays. Vanessa has been really good about turning down birthday party invitations that are on Sunday. We don't allow sleepovers. I expect my kids to be chaste until they are married. I don't plan on allowing them to drink, or "experiment" with whatever else teenagers decide to experiment with. We are different simply by the nature of who we are.
But I might as well list the 1,298 reasons. Or, at least maybe five reasons why I like homeschooling. Although if you would like a good laugh about it, you can read this article. Some of my reasons for homeschooling include: 1) safety (from violence, sex abuse, molestation, bullying, etc) Sure they have to learn about these things and how to protect themselves eventually, but not at 5 thank you.
2) vacation. Jon's work schedule is amazing in that he gets 7 weeks vacation. Seven weeks! However, those are scattered throughout the year. We will homeschool year round and the kids are on vacation when Jon is on vacation. This allows for easier vacation planning which gives us more family time. 3) progress at their level. I sincerely feel like Vanessa was ready for more than kindergarten was ready to give her. It basically felt like a waste of time. Maybe they were doing more than I could see from the outside. But it is seriously stressful getting your kid to school at 8am so it had better be dang well worth the effort. 4) religion. I don't have to worry about what they might be learning that is contrary to what we believe. I can teach them that some people believe "this" or "this" but we believe "this." And yes, my child is only 5 so I am teaching her to believe what I believe. She'll get to make that decision for herself some day, but when she's older. We can also talk about how God is involved in everything. We can pray. We can even say Bless You. 5) Germs. Yes, this is totally paranoid and weird but germs are a big deal for us. I kept Vanessa home from school for four days in the two months that she was in school. Not because she was "really sick," but because I wanted her home so she would get better quick, had an easy day, and wasn't exposed to more germs. Every time she was home, I got a call from the school. And kids with a perfect attendance record freak me out. What kind of bugs were they going to school with that they passed to my kid?
So that sums up the why. My kids are out of patience so the HOW will have to come another day.
