For Jon

We miss him already. He flew out this morning, super early, headed for Florida to drive our cars to Kansas City. His dad is helping out, thanks Matt! He also gets a fun detour on the road, meeting up with his brothers Tommy and Steven in Little Rock. Then they will drive somewhere to go to the Ole Miss v BYU game. It's late and I honestly can't remember where the Ole Miss campus is. It's not Little Rock and it's not Memphis, but it's around there. My brain these days! Anyway, I probably won't be seeing Jon for a whole month. The kids and I are staying with my parents for a month and then we'll go to St Louis for three months with Jon. It's going to be a long month. I kinda like the guy. But, I promised Jon I would keep the blog up to date with lots of pictures of the kids. So here is what we did today. Amidst getting all our stuff into storage and a little unpacking.

We played in the sand

And ate popsicles.  This was the first time Benson got to hold his own.  The cold surprised him a little, when he got a big chunk.  But he went crazy for that sugary water.  He ate/spilled all of his and half of Vanessa's.

We also jumped on the tramp, looked at the clouds, made a huge mess at dinner, took a bath and Vanessa crashed reading books at 7:00.  Benson followed soon after around 7:30.  Yes, that is a record.  Neither kid took naps (well Benson skipped his afternoon nap) and we spent ample time outside running out energy.  I don't remember Utah summers being this pleasant.  Have they always been this way or am I really that used to Florida heat?  I could sit outside in the shade here at the hottest time of the day and feel great.  In Florida, my under layer would have been sticking to my body and sweat all over my hairline.  It's a nice change.  Though I do have a sudden need for chapstick and lotion that is not so nice.  I guess I have a love/hate with humidity. 

We miss you already Jon.  Hope you have a fun road trip and rock your cardiac rotation.  We'll keep the pictures coming!

I'll Miss you Florida

We are leaving in just one short week.  We actually have to have our house completely packed by Sunday because they give us a three day windown of when the truck will come.  Nuts, I know.  They are supposed to let us know by Friday a definite time.  It has been kinda crazy and kinda chill around here at the same time.  I've been trying to take the kids out for half the day and pack for half the day.  It's exhausting.  I feel tired all the time.  And on top of that, all the thinking and planning and anxiety and excitement has left me NOT sleeping very well.  Sheesh.  But, before we leave I felt I MUST write some of my favorite things about Florida.
I love the winters.  Summer is okay.  Ironically, I felt I enjoyed it more last summer, when I was pregnant.  Weird, I know.  But it's just so darn hot and honestly, with two babies, I get bored going to the beach and sitting on the sand and building a gazillion sand castles that are destroyed in five seconds.  Yep, that was pretty positive.  So, back to winter.  Winter is amazing.  Parks all the time. Walks all the time.  The weather is just perfect.  Plus, it's Christmas and there are some people that really get into the spirit and do awesome decorations.  We went and looked at least once a week before we went out to Utah.
There is awesome shopping here.  I really am not much of a shopper and buying things on loans definitely looses it's appeal, but there are some awesome stores here.  I will definitely miss the year round green and palm trees. 
I love how chill the ward is.  I don't feel that pressure to let a calling be your life.  People get their stuff done, but they also don't expect hours and hours and hours. 
I love that no one really does their hair.  Honestly, it gets ruined in about five minutes after stepping outside anyway.  Why bother?  And because everyone is always at the pool or the beach, I don't feel like everyone is all judgey about swimsuits and cellulite.  It's pretty awesome.
The thing I will definitely miss the VERY most and possibly an unbelievable amount is my friends.  Of course, all of them are from our ward.  I honestly don't know how people move across the country, not know anyone and then just magically make friends.  Jon's classmates have eachother, but we aren't quite like them.  I mean, we did take our kids clubbing once, but that was totally by accident and a traumatizing experience.  So really, I don't know what we would have done without the ward.  And I LOVE the ladies in our ward.  They are some of the most amazing women here, who have seriously impacted my life.  I just can't imagine what I would have done here without them.  I don't know that I ever would have made friends if it hadn't been for the church.  What an amazing organization, in so many ways.  I will miss you Plantation and Davie ward ladies.  I love you all and I seriously hope to see you all again someday!

Pics and Update

Benson is a total mama's boy. But then again what boy doesn't love his mother more than anything?

Benson recently discovered what makes him a boy... and every time he finds it, this is his face.Vanessa is becoming quite the artist. She loves to color in books, on the walls, and on herself.

Sadly, we sold the motorcycle. Benson enjoyed it while he could.
Sleeping Beauties (which is now Vanessa's favorite movie)

We were probably watching a very manly movie, like Care Bears or Curious George.

Vanessa is becoming quite a good swimmer, though she still doesn't like going under water.

We'll be leaving Florida in just a few weeks after living here for the past 14 months. It'll be interesting to see how the kids adjust to a new place. They're used to going to the beach, pool, splash park... pretty much swimming everywhere they go. We've become accustomed to all the lizards, snakes, frogs, and ducks everywhere. The reptiles love to hang out at our front door and even get inside every once in a while. We now have two alligators living in the pond 30 yards away from us.

Lynette is an amazing mother that takes such good care of the kids 24/7. She also takes care of me, which is no easy task. She has become a wonderful chef and frequently surprises me with incredible meals. In addition to being a mother, wife and chef, she is studying to become a childbirth instructor, continues to do photography, and is a young woman's advisor, teaching every Sunday. I'm impressed with how much she does and how well she does it... she's a lot busier than I am.

Other than school I'm serving as the exec secretary in the bishopric and I'm enjoying it more than I thought I would. I'm currently rotating at University Hospital in Tamarac. Most patients are older and very sick so it's been a good experience. There are plenty of opportunities for me to practice general, MAC and regional anesthesia as we do cases ranging from hip replacements to spinal fusions to colonoscopies. Classes will end in a few weeks and then we begin a year of clinical rotations around the country. Our schedule is as follows:

Sept: Kansas City, MO

Oct-Dec: St. Louis, MO

Jan - Feb: Denver, CO

Mar: Logan, UT

April: Salt Lake City, UT

May: Panama City, FL

June: Albany, GA

July: Albuquerque, NM

Lynette and the kids will joining me from Oct to April. The rest of the time I'll be on my own while they stay in Utah with family. Really, I don't know how I'm going to survive without them.

We Will Survive

The past two weeks our family's immune systems have taken a hiatus.  First, Jon got some weird stomach bug that we thought was some odd kind of food poisoning.  Until I got it.  Then we realized it was some kind of bug, since food poisoning isn't contagious.  And let me just say this was not a oh-I'm-so-nauseated-I-could-just-puke kind of bug.  This was the most awkward stomach PAIN I have ever had.  It was seriously weird.  Anyway, just as we are on the mends, Benson comes down with a cold.  This boy doesn't do sick well.  His cold spread to Vanessa who ended up getting croup two nights in a row.  We loaded both kids up with Night Time Triaminic, okay we didn't load them up, but gave them a reasonable dose, and they are sleeping soundly, hopefully getting better.  No, we will NOT be taking them to church tomorrow.  Not only do we not want to get all the kids in nursery sick, but I don't want them catching anything!  We have been avoiding the public like the plague!  I thought one sick kid was rough, but two.  Two is enough to kill a person.  And being sick and still having to take care of kids isn't much fun either.  But, now that I have whined enough to make you all sick yourselves, I will say that last night I got a beautiful 8 hours of sleep, only slightly interupted.  It. Was. Glorious.


I just gave Benson a buzz.  I know you can't really tell, because poor guy didn't have much hair anyway.  But ironically, more people have been telling me since the haircut how much his hair is coming in.  Go figure.  Doesn't he look so cute in this pic?  I love it because it is a classic Benson look.  He puts a lot of effort into his scouting around and he will always lay his head on his hands like this to take a break.

  So, the day after the fourth, we went to the Miami Seaquarium and the beach right next to it.  It was nice to have free parking, but the beach was kinda gross (I think I dug up some dog poop, yuck!).  It was still funn and we just stopped digging in the sand after that.


Vanessa is obsessed with jumping and climbing.  Can you tell she is jumping in the pic?  You might have to enlarge it to see, but she's got a small vertical there.  I'm stoked to actually have an income and put her in gymnastics.  I think she would be so good.  I also secretly think she would be a great flyer (as in cheerleader) but I really don't want her to be a cheerleader so we'll keep that thought a secret.  She has also mastered dragging chairs and stools over to get things off of tall shelves.  Nothing is safe anymore, namely chocolate.  Ha ha.



Jon is seriously the most amazing husband and dad.  He is so patient with me and I love him to death.  He does give me funny looks sometimes though.  Understandable, I am losing my mind.  I can't believe we've only been married 3 1/2 years.  I told him so today as we was describing to me exactly what I would do in a certain situation and he was  dead on.  He just knows me that well, and still loves me, crazy isn't?! 

 

This is another classic Benson.  He always has to see what is going on.  And if you put your head in his face to get his attention, ya, he'll just swat it away.  And growl.  Nursing him has become a serious challenge because there can be NOTHING going on in the room.  Also getting him to sleep is a little tricky, especially because Vanessa wants to follow and her little jabber keeps him quite enthralled.  Though we do love her chatter (most the time, ha ha!)



Our nail biter.  I am not allowed to touch her nails with clippers.  She absolutely freaks out.  I've tried to do it in her sleep.  She's a deep sleeper, and it ain't happenin.  So the biting continues.  Why is biting your nails a bad habit anyway?

Other things of note, Benson started pointing at the aquarium AND said his first word, "WOW."  He also says "whoa."  And I am pretty sure he knows ball, but it comes out more like "ba."  He gives open-mouth kisses, claps, has a wounded soldier scoot, plays with his toes, loves the water, eats sand, loves balls and anything Vanessa is holding.  He hasn't been a great eater due to his recent sickness and has made me rather nervous.  But I think his appetite is slowly coming back.  He LOVES milk.  He seems to always know which sippy cup has milk in it and he can scoot over to it surprisingly fast.  Sadly though, it still makes him really sick.  Trust me a baby with a cold, and a gurgly, sick tummy is NOT fun.
Vanessa's favorite color is purple.  Her favorite toys are her animals.  Her favorite song is Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star.  She loves to color and put stickers all over things.  She still hates strollers, but likes shopping carts.  She has started copying phrases we say a lot, such as "how 'bout..."  "that's so funny!"  "That's so pretty!"  "My hair so pretty!"  She loves her silky nightgown but her first choice is always being naked.  She has learned though that she has to wear clothes to go outside.  If we start talking about leaving and she's naked, she will point to her naked belly while running into her room saying "I need clothes."

We still haven't heard where Jon will be in September.  It is frustrating to no-end.  We would really love to know how to plan things, but we are just waiting on that bit of news.  There is a chance that Jon could be here, in South Florida.  But regardless, we have decided the kids and I will head to Utah for September.  We are excited to see family, so it'll be nice.  But it will be sad to be without Jon.  I won't pretend for a second that I like being without him.  I want him around, why else did I marry him?!
I've written a million posts in my head the past week while trying to calm crying babies in the middle of the night.  As interesting as they are, I'm always too lazy to write them.  Or, at least they are interesting to me.  I get rather, uh, passionate about certain topics.  And usually, they are just my opinion on random things.  Maybe I should start my own opinion blog.  I know EVERYONE would be dying to read it, lol.  I love talking about topics with people who are equally passionate about them as I am, as long as we have the same philosophy.  I am not into debate, ha ha.  I don't really enjoy on-line forums though.  I feel like people get really catty and immature.  And, don't laugh at me, but I can't handle poor grammar.  Seriously, can't stand it. 
So what else have I been doing with my abundant free time?  Well, today I made sugar cookies that Vanessa dumped a bunch of extra baking soda into.  Ever wonder what that will do?  It makes them dense, hard, crunchy, something like that.  They still taste okay though.  I am also reading a childbirth book and have at least 8 others waiting.  When I was pregnant with Vanessa, I read two books a week.  No kidding.  I read the Twilight Series in a weekend.  I have been working on this current book for something ridiculous like a month and a half.  I like to read random articles on-line.  I like that I can start and finish one, haha.  I also throw in a YW lesson couple times a month.  I suck up all the extra time Jon has right now for everything it is worth.  We watch the Office, even though I don't really like Steve Carell.  I've been wanting to make some cute fabric flower headbands.  I have all the materials, I just need to do it.  I think I'm waiting till I can use my mom's sewing machine in September.  And obviously, blogging.  And I probably spend more time than I should on facebook.  Blogging is at least a journal.  Facebook is just, well, facebook.  And that sums up my life.  Sometimes it feels really monotinous, because it is.  But being home with my kids is yet another one of those things I am so passionate about.  So, it's kids, cooking, cleaning, and a few random hobbies I enjoy sporadically.  As for now, I think I will choose to read myself to sleep.

4th of July

To celebrate the 4th we began the day at the Plantation City 4th of July Parade with our friends, the Spilkers and the Smiths...

Benson loved the free candy

Our baby girl has turned into a little lady. When did this happen?! Vanessa with the Spilker boys (Michael and Jack)

She's trying to figure this one out

After the morning parade and an afternoon swim/barbecue (Lynette found a good deal on ribs and they were delicious ) we ended the day watching fireworks at Central Park...

GOD BLESS AMERICA!!

Pieces To The Puzzle

We are slowly getting word of how our crazy year will be spent. Jon starts clinicals in September, though still no word where(unimportant detail anyway,right). But we do know the following...
Oct-Dec... St. Louis, Missouri
Jan-Feb... Aurora,Colorado
March-April...Utah!!!
May...?
June...?
July...probably New Mexico
August...?
We feel so blessed with how things are turning out. And I'm also learning to be patient and not whine so much. I just can't help that I am a planner. I have to evaluate and change my mind five times before I make a decision. Changing your mind that much takes time! Anyway, it's turning up futile to try and plan temporary housing in advance so I guess it didn't really matter not knowing. At least now I can sit up at 1am and look at craigslist for housing, etc. It feels sorta productive :)

Face plant, a question and the best dad ever

Benson sitting and smiling for the camera

Benson face planting.  He does this occassionally.  He actually did this yesterday on the kitchen counter trying to grab some food.  Smashed his face on the counter, but he didn't even cry.  Why does he do this?  No idea, he can proficiently sit on his own.  Crazy kid.

The mess that your face becomes after a face plant.



 So we did a shoot tonight for some friends who are leaving Florida and heading west.  I'm really sad to see them go.  But I sincerely hope we'll be able to meet up with them in Utah...one day.  They are a great family and we had so much fun doing their pictures.  We brought the kids.  We usually do.  We figure one of us can shoot while the other watches and then we trade.  In the past it has worked okay, but Vanessa desperately wanted to play with the other kids.  Remember how big of a deal friends are to her.  So poor Jon was chasing her and having to pull her out of the picture all the time.  Probably the last time Vanessa comes to a shoot.  It was all okay at the end of the day when we went to McDonalds and she ate an entire hamburger!  Go Vanessa.  I knew she could eat!  So you're probably wondering about the question part.  That's Benson.  He does this all day long.  Raising his hand, like he has a question.  I've asked him a couple times if he has a question and he always shakes his head "no" like he knows what I am asking.  That kid cracks me up.  And doesn't this picture make you look at it and just think... that looks like the best dad in the whole world?  Well it should, cause he is :)

Check it Out

A few new posts....JayElle Photography

New Beach and The Proof

Proof of sunscreen application

We drove to Key Biscayne and went to the Cape Florida Lighthouse.  It was worth seeing once, but probably not worth going back.  As it got later and later, the beach started to smell worse and worse, like sulfur.  Odd.

Stranger Anxiety

I'm not sure if anyone even noticed but in one of the pictures from Vanessa's birthday, Benson is in the background looking extremely upset. It breaks my heart. Enter mom can't leave me stage. I have a really hard time with this stage. I struggled with it with Vanessa to no end. Most people here don't even know Vanessa had a stranger anxiety stage. She went to nursery like a champ and never really had any problems. But she had it bad up until about a year. And I had it so bad that I didn't leave her. I can think of maybe five times that I left her and four of those five, she was with my mom, who we lived with, and Vanessa was fine with her. So, now that Benson has entered this stage, I am feeling that familiar anxiety as well. Maybe it's because I am a psych major, maybe it's because I spent way too much time at DCFS (as an employee, not a client), I feel like I can't leave him when he is showing that anxiety. I start to get anxious and worry about the long term implications. What if it causes attachment problems? What if it makes him feel like I've abandoned him? What it makes him think he can't count on me? And what if it does absolutely nothing at all and I stressed for no reason?
At least he is darn cute right? I mean, who wouldn't want to be around this face all day?

Good Reads

I realize most people don't share my obsession about childbirth, but since most women do give birth, I thought I would review some of the books I have read. My #1 recommendation if you were to only read one book is The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth. But, here are some other thoughts:

Books:
HypnoBirthing: the Mongan Method by Marie F. Mongan (wasn't helpful to me for labor, but others have liked it)

The Birth Book by Dr Sears (loved it)

The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth by Henci Goer (great information, great compilation of research)

Husband Coached Childbirth by Dr Bradley (also a good one. If I could afford these classes, I would have taken these. This is most similar to what I used in labor)

Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way by Susan McCutcheon-Rosegg, Erick Ingraham, Robin Yoko Burningham and Robert A. Bradley (another great Bradley book)

Birthing From Within by Pam England and Rob Horowitz (a little too hippie, even for me)

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin (great info from a great midwife)

The Baby Book by Dr Sears (covers pregnancy, birth, and breastfeeding briefly but mostly about baby care. All of it is great though. As one woman put it, it's a Baby Bible, LOL)

What to Expect When You're Expecting by Heidi Murkoff (I shouldn't say it's a waste of time, but I didn't feel there was anything to be learned that your doc wouldn't tell you. It's a fluffy bare minimum book)

The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnany by Vicki Iovine (same as above with some humor)

Homebirth in the Hospital by Stacey Marie Kerr (stories of births by a family doctor, interesting but not a lot of useful info)

The Official Lamaze Guide:For a Healthy Pregnancy and Birth by Judith Lothian (felt pretty fluffy, I wouldn't recommend this one)
Pushed by Jennifer Block (I couldn't finish this one when I
was prego so I'll have to get back to it. It made me upset with the whole medical model of birth)

Childbed Fever (SO interesting, a biography about Ignaz Semmelweis and OBs learning to wash their hands)
WHO website
Cochrane Libraries online

Vanessa's Birthday

Was clear back on May 20.  We had a joint party for her at the splash park.  Jon wasn't able to go since this was during the day, so we had cake and ice cream and opened gifts from the family the day of. 

I can't believe she is 2.  She thinks she is older of course.  She is talking like crazy.  Lately, everything is a need, as opposed to just something she wants. 
"I need  my animals" or "I need chocolate."  We definitely have a choco-holic on our hands.  As well as a general sweets lover.  Vanessa still loves going to nursery and "playing with the kids."  Her friends are already a big deal.  I swear we pay attention to her and play with her, but Sam, Lily and Jack are sooo much cooler.
She likes to say she will do whatever someone else is doing too.  For instance, if Lily says, "I'll go get my boots."  Vanessa will say "I'll go get my boots too."  She does this with everything.  It's confusing to people sometimes.  Especially in nursery when she says she needs to go potty just cause one of the other kids did, even though she refuses to actually go on the potty.  She will sit on the potty when her diaper is on, but if I try to take her diaper off to have her sit, it's the end of the world.  Silly girl. 
Vanessa knows all her colors and shapes.  She has no interest in counting, the alphabet, or going potty.  Everything is on her time schedule.  Which honestly, I am fine with. 
She is doing tons better at night.  But Jon and I have completely relented and let her come in bed with us, she usually saunters in around midnight.  She just sleeps so much better knowing mom and dad are close.  Plus, it's about the only time we feel like she actually needs us still so we'll suck it up for all it's worth :)  I also happen to think she is scared of the dark.  When she wakes up, she won't leave our room until I go turn on the light in another room, because "its dark, mommy."
Vanessa still loves her animals.  These things go everywhere.  We have started limiting her to two animals for outings.  These usually results in a frantic decision at the door, but she has decided it's okay. 
Naps are pretty much a thing of the past.  She naps occassionally.  And usually it's when we are on our way home from somewhere around 1:00 or 2:00.  She usually needs a nap around 4:00 or 5:00 but if I let her nap at this time, she is up incredibly late and I just can't do that.  So, we have to push through a couple rough hours sometimes in order to hit the sack around 7:00.  She'll sleep until 8:00am though, so it isn't all bad.  Then Jon and I get a few hours in the evening with little Benson man.  He goes to bed around 9:00pm usually. 
Vanessa is so much fun.  We laugh at this girl all the time.  She has started doing this little snort thing that just makes me laugh everytime.  It's so un-lady like and so funny!  She is the sweetest thing in the world.  She gives Benson kisses any time he starts crying, even if it's because she just hit him.  Sometimes I swear she makes him cry so she can "kiss it better." 
I feel like I narrate my life to Vanessa.  Whenever I leave the room, I tell her.  I tell her where I am going and that I will "be right back."  This has caused Vanessa to narrate her life to me.  "I go get diaper mommy, be right back."  "I go get wagon mommy, be right back."  I love it.  I think it's the cutest thing ever.
Vanessa also just got a darling little haircut yesterday.  We cut off about an inch (not me, but my friend did) and stacked the back.  Also trimmed up her bangs so they aren't always in her face.  Hallelujah.  It was much needed!  Pics to come.  It's been a crazy 24 hours so I haven't taken any yet.

That's Why I Married Him

A few weeks ago, I went to two different grocery stores and both times forgot fresh basil. Not wanting to go again, I text Jon and asked him to grab some on his way home. When he walked in, he had the dried kind. Doesn't exactly work for pesto. I told him it was no big deal, I would go get some later or the next day. He was determined to help out, so he went back. When he came home the second time, he had bought me this baby.

I will never need fresh basil again. Problem solved. And that is why I married this man.

I've Made Up My Mind

I feel like if I announce this I will actually do it.  After Jon starts clinicals full time (like September-ish),  I am going to start the certification for childbirth educator.  I've picked the organization I am  going to use.  I'm way excited about it.  I really hope to be able to teach women they are in charge of their pregnancy and birth.  And it can be a wonderful experience.Check out CBI's site here

Moments Like These

Vanessa has started taking toys from kids, especially Benson.  It makes me really sad.  She never used to do this.  I guess that is part of growing up and learning how to be around other kids.  But look at that face!  Benson looks completely crushed.  He's gonna have to toughen up to survive this girl.

A few happy moments amongst a long, hard couple weeks at the Brady home.  Filled with frustration, stress, sickness, whining and crying.  But, I at least, am feeling better so hopefully we can all get back on our feet now.